Patron: Hi! I’ve never been to this museum before. Is there anything I absolutely cannot miss?
Me: Well, first and foremost, this is not a museum.
Patron: Right! Library. I knew that.
Me: But, in answer to your question, you want to go see the rare books department on the third floor. It’s got a bunch of super old, very cool books, and there’s… dammit. I keep forgetting what this summer’s exhibit is.
Patron: Cuneiform tablets.
Me: Wait, you already knew?
Patron: I just wanted to see what else was here!
Next Patron: A what tablet now?
Me: Cuneiform. It’s like this ancient, carved stone tablet. Think 10 commandments.
Next Patron: Hmm. You said that’s the third floor? That would be… Q-U-N-E-form.
Me: Definitely not. C-U-N-E-I-F-O-R-M.
Next Patron: I was close! That English degree is really coming in handy!
Me: oh god