Security Guard comes up to me with a stack of DVDs.
Me: Do you still have [movie]?
Security Guard: No, I returned that!
Me: My computer tells me it was due last week and we still don’t have it.
Security Guard: No, I returned that!
Me: Are you completely sure?
Security Guard: Yes! I returned that!
I go check the shelves and find 2 copies of the movie. Neither is the one Security Guard took out.
Me: Well, we don’t have it.
Security Guard: So you’re telling me that the computer says I still have it.
Me: Several times, yes.
Security Guard: The computer says I never brought it back.
Me, internally: How long will this last
Me, externally: Yup
Security Guard: So the computer says that it’s still checked out to me.
Me: YES
Security Guard: I returned that.
Me: Good god
15 MINUTES LATER
Security Guard: I think I still have it.