Mumbly Patron: Heyifyouhavepairofscissorscanyouopenthismaybe?
Mumbly Patron hands me a new pair of earbuds.
Me: Haha what’s this giant dent with the black spots? What did you try to open this with?
Mumbly Patron: Cigar
Me: Ew
I do a HULK SMASH and rip it open so it can go away forever.
Me: here ya go!
Mumbly Patron: thanks
Me: Oh god I can smell the cigar. Oh god it’s all over me help
Security Guard: Did that patron just hand you something to open?
Me, taking a shower in hand sanitizer: Yeah
Security Guard: Well why didn’t they just do it themselves?
Me: Man I don’t know
Security Guard: And then they left their trash on the floor!
Me: This is an emotional rollercoaster and I don’t care for it