Horror or Something

Head of Department: Oooh, look at this ARC* I just got! They sent me a gummy tarantula! It’s like, some horror novel or something.

Cait: I want a gummy tarantula!

Me: “The Speed of Falling Objects”?

Me: Shouldn’t it just be “Terminal Velocity”? Since that’s shorter and a little scarier?

Head of Department: Shut up?

Me: That’s fair. I respect that.

Cait: You should just write book names yourself.

Me: I WOULD BE SO GOOD AT THAT

Me: Where would I sign up for that job?

Cait: I actually know someone who works in publishing and does that kind of work. They’re doing very well for themselves.

Me: Oooo

Cait: But you have to live in New York.

Me: …I don’t really want to leave Philly, but for enough money I’d go.

Me: What do you think, Supervisor? Should I go into publishing?

Head of Department: Definitely not.

Me: Eh?

Head of Department: Working for a library pays better, you have to live in New York, and you wind up taking all your work home with you.

Cait: Yeah actually my friend basically spends all their time reading.

Head of Department: And I love reading! But when it becomes mandatory… I no longer love reading.

Me: Oh. Yeah. See, I want other people to read my stuff and thought maybe working in publishing might be a shortcut-

Head of Department: Nope.

Me: Guess I’ll stay here, then

Head of Department: On this side of the industry you get bribed to give good reviews with gummy tarantulas.

Head of Department: I call that a win.

 

*Advanced Reader Copy- books not yet published that are sent to libraries and other organizations to get reviews and press and blurbs and stuff.

1 thought on “Horror or Something

  1. Funny thing about that. I have to come up with book titles all the time. It’s not a separate job for a small independent publisher. Just did a new one less than an hour ago, in fact. And I don’t live anywhere near New York (having already served my time there). On the other hand, I’m not making a Manhattan salary, either.

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