Patron: I’m sorry, I just have a question. You’re gonna think it’s super ignorant.
Me: Believe me, if you’re self-aware enough to say that, you’re not even gonna break my top ten today.
Patron: Oh really?
Me: It’s a good way to go about life. Ask simple, sensible questions and pretend like an idiot. If you tell everyone you’re an idiot-
Patron: Who would argue against it?
Me: It’s endearing, and it always gets me the answers I need.
Patron: That’s brilliant.
Me: So what’s your question?
Patron:
Patron:
Patron: I don’t remember.