Patron: Can I have a library card?
Me: Have you ever had a library card before?
Patron: Nnnnnnoooooo?
Me, internally: LYING
Me, externally: That sure sounds like a yes! Can I see your ID?
So I go through the process to replace their library card.
Me: It’ll be 1 dollar to replace the card.
Patron’s Friend: Yo get me one, too!
Patron: I’m not doing YOUR library card.
Patron’s Friend: I don’t know if I can do it, it’s like 26 dollars.
Me: I literally just said the price out loud.
Patron’s Friend: Yo how much is it to get a new card?
Me: