Patron sits their bag on the desk.
Patron: Ugh, I can’t find my card.
Me: Take your time.
Patron: No!!! I hope I didn’t lose it!
Me: I also hope that.
Patron searches frantically for about 60 more seconds. Takes out wallet, looks in all the pockets, et cetera.
Patron: Oh! It’s in my pocket.
Me: Wonderful.
Patron checks out their book.
Me: Have a nice day!
2 minutes later, Patron returns.
Patron: I LOST MY CARD!!!
Me: I gave it back to you.
Patron: No not THAT card! My credit card!
Me: I watched you pull it out of your wallet, put it back in, then put that in your backpack.
Patron: No I didn’t! I dropped it!
Me: Check your wallet, friend.
Patron checks their wallet.
Patron: It’s here! Oh wow, it’s here.
Me: You feeling okay over there?
Patron: This is kind of a normal day for me.