Co-written by Jilly Schwab
If you’ve known me longer than about 28.3 seconds, you probably know that I like to make weird noises. This can range from keeping a harmonica (that I do not know how to play) in my pocket at all times to beatboxing (which I do not know how to do well, but Jilly’s pretty decent) but it often manifests as random meowing. So there Jilly and I were in DC, in a packed elevator. It stops once more for a mom and her two children, soaked and shivering from the hotel pool. They huddle themselves into the corner opposite us.
Awkward beat. Avoiding eye contact.
Me: …meeeew
Jilly: mow?
Buncha Kids: ???
Me: meow!!
Jilly: MOW.
Kiddos: ?
Me: mew
Jilly: rrreow
Kids, snickering: ?!?!
The elevator arrives to our floor, and we begin to go our separate ways. Wide eyed at the fact they they just witnessed grown-ass adults meow-speaking, these kids don’t even wait for us to be out of earshot before falling over laughing. We can’t even make it down the hallway before we start laughing too.
Long story short, this is why you should leave the serious conversations you don’t wanna have with your kids to us