Playa

Almost every time I go to see my man Gus I walk away with a new tall tale to spin- and that’s not even what makes the $10 cost of admission worth it. It really is the best lunch I’ve found in this city.

Me: God, I love this place.

Guy in Line Behind Me: It’s amazing, isn’t it?

Me: Best lunch in the city.

Guy in Line Behind Me: yeah, so good.

Guy in Line Behind Me: so good.

Guy in Line Behind Me: I asked him once, where he gets the good shit to put in these plates.

Guy in Line Behind Me: He said he’s have to kill me for that. Hah!

Me: Hah, yep

Guy in Line Behind Me: he got, like, some black market shit goin on here.

Me: Uhh… sure.

Guy in Line Behind Me: And that’s how you do it! You keep your head down, do what you do, and don’t let everyone know how it is you do what you do

Me: Haha yep

Guy in Line Behind Me: See, it’s people like him that have the real money. Motherfucker’s gotta be loaded.

Me: I doubt that sincerely.

Guy in Line Behind Me: Nah, see, he hidin’ it. He understands how you do.

Guy in Line Behind Me: Keep your head down, don’t show off your money , then you get to keep it.

Me: I am very done with this conversation

Guy in Line Behind Me: That’s how you find real money, and that’s how you get the fe-males.

Me: Oh, Christ.

Guy in Line Behind Me: See, that’s what I learned when I was hangin out with this older playa. He taught me, it’s not about possessions. The fe-males, if you have all your money on display, just look at you and see an ATM. But if you’re confident, if you know how you do, that’s how you can get all the fe-males swarming around you. Like a boss.

Me: Every time you say “fe-male” I’m pretty sure a fairy dies

Guy in Line Behind Me: And that’s some advice from one playa to another.

Me: Gus

Guy in Line Behind Me: Keep your head down, make that fuckin money

Me: Gus is my food ready yet

Guy in Line Behind Me: And get yourself a fe-male

Gus: You wait there! You wait for me to call you.

Me: GUS HELP ME

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