Friend: And then, I was at WaWa, and… I wanted potatoes, but they didn’t have any, so they offered me quinoa, but they didn’t have any of that, either.
Me: That’s good. You shouldn’t be eating quinoa anyway.
Friend: but it’s healthy and high protein and-
Me: And it’s wrecking the economies of developing nations. For them it’s a staple food, but we think of it as fancy-dancy and pay a lot for it, so they wind up exporting their own food supply to sate our colonizing lust for “exotic” grains.
Friend: Yeah, well
Friend: You’re stupid!
THE NEXT DAY
Me: Hey, come get a load of these chocolate-covered almonds. They’re awesome!
That Same Friend: It takes a gallon of water to produce a single almond and they are the single biggest agricultural contributor to California’s drought problem.
Me: uh
Friend, taking an almond: Enjoy your blood almonds, colonizer!