Self-conscious

Me: So, Lady Friend 1, your first husband was-

Lady Friend 2: Tiny man. Ohhh… sorry… I kind of blurted that out.

Lady Friend 1 shrugs.

Me: Saw his dick, didja?

Lady Friend 2: No, I didn’t, but-

Me, turning to Lady Friend 1: Saw his dick, didja?

Lady Friend 1: Once or twice. I think.

Me: What, you didn’t fuck him?

Lady Friend 1: He… wasn’t great. I mostly block out those memories.

Me, internally: I wonder how many women say that about me

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