Patron: My child here
Me: uh huh
Patron: Checked out a book about two days ago
Me: Yup
Patron: And we were wondering
Me: Please, take your time in explaining this
Patron: Since we’re going to a program here at the library
Me: I already know what you want
Patron: The program is downstairs, y’see
Me: I’m not working or anything, please continue
Patron: And, I admit, I’ve been careless
Me: Someone shoot me
Patron: I have the library card with me here
Me: Are we close to the end yet
Patron: If you would be so kind as to
Me: SPIT IT OUT ALREADY
Patron: print out a new receipt for us?
Me: click click done goodbye forever