Coworker’s Friend: …I’m trying to set up a library card, but-
Me: Say no more
Me: Yikes
Me: Coworker did lots of this wrong. Let me fix it.
Me: You’re all set! Tell Coworker Matt said they DUN GOOFED
Me: You heard me. TELL THEM I’M TALKIN SHIT
5 minutes later
Coworker: My friend says you were talkin shit
Coworker: Or, more accurately, they said you specifically instructed them to tell me you were talkin shit
Me: DAMMIT THEY WEREN’T SUPPOSED TO SAY THE INSTRUCTION PART
Me: I HAD A PLAN
Me: A GLORIOUS PLAN
Coworker: I think they wanted to yank your chain more than mine.
Me: IT WORKED